PET Scan Results!

Today I got a call from my doctor. He had good news. The PET scan showed zero "uptake" in the spot in my chest that still showed up on the CT-scan. So it looks like all of the cancer cells are gone! The doctor said that it is most likely scar tissue left over or dead cells waiting to be absorbed by the rest of my body, and it could just go away over time. Definitely good news.

The scan did show a little bit of "uptake" in my prostate, which the doctor said is a bit abnormal. He asked if I had recently had any pain when peeing (or whatever their term for that is) which I haven't. He said it might be just a bit of an infection or something, and didn't seem too concerned about it. He would have been fine to just have be watchful and notice if anything felt strange or off, but also offered to do an exam to make more sure. I decided it would be nice to get more info and not be wondering, and to get closer to a "clean" bill of health. So we will be doing an exam on Monday to make sure nothing seems abnormal down there.

Besides Monday, the plan is to meet with the doctor in about 3 months and do blood work and probably another CT scan, just to make sure that everything still looks the same or smaller. And as long as things are good we will just be meeting every 3 months for the next few years.

We are still wondering if this news means what it seems to mean, and getting our heads wrapped around the idea that maybe I am done having cancer, and that everything has worked out. I am sure in the next little while it will sink in more, and having the prostate exam behind us will help out with that too. Thanks for all your prayers and kind wishes! We have been so blessed.

Update: PET scan

I guess I never managed to give the update. We heard back after the doctor's meeting and they decided to do a PET scan to see where things stand. I go in about an hour for that scan, which they said should take about 2-3 hours. Hopefully this scan will let the doctors know just what they need to so they are sure about the path forward. I am not sure exactly when we will find out the results, but I will post them here when I find out. A kind sister in the ward is watching our kids (with her kids) so that Brittney can come with me this morning.

the road ahead

We saw the doctors today. The news was about what I was expecting. It looks like the cancer is completely gone, except for the node that was the biggest to begin with. The doctors had told us from the very beginning that this node was just at the limits of what they could shrink with chemotherapy alone, but they wanted to try that first. Turns out it didn't quite get it all, although it still shrunk considerably even since our January scan.

It sounds like there are two possibilities for the next step. We could do a PET scan, which will yield more information about the mass in my chest, specifically shedding light on whether or not there are still active cancer cells there or if it is just scar tissue left over from the large mass. Then if it ended up being active, we would move on to radiation.

The other possibility is to just do radiation, to be sure and get rid of everything. The downside to this is that studies show that radiation increases the likelihood of secondary cancers 20 years down the line. The caveat here though, is that all of these studies are based on people who were treated with 20 year old radiation technology and techniques. The doctor said that they basically used to just blast your whole chest with radiation. Now they are a lot more precise and can basically just get the thing they are aiming for. So it is to be expected that the chances of secondary cancer complications in the future is less than the studies show, but this is of course unknown as of now.

Our doctor feels, and we agree, that it would be much better to be sure and get rid of everything now, and deal with any potential problems 20 years down the road, rather than potentially missing this opportunity and continue to grow in the next year or something and be too big to be treated by radiation. Who knows what advances cancer treatment or prevention will see in those 20 years as well.

Our doctor is convening a meeting of all the Cancer Centre's lymphoma doctors tomorrow to review my case and reach a consensus decision, just to make sure he isn't missing anything. We will have all the doctors in our prayers so that they are led and directed in making the right one. We should hear back probably Wednesday what they decided, and most likely move on to radiation or the PET scan next week. The radiation would most likely be every weekday for 4 weeks, taking about 30 minutes a day. Of course, with travel and wait time it will probably eat up more time than that, but it will be nice having the Cancer Centre right next to the university.

So, that is the update. We will know more for sure later in the week, but for now we are taking it as good news that the chemo got rid of everything else, and we are excited to get rid of what little is left. Thanks again for your prayers, love, and support.

A moment of truth

The scan last week went ok, I guess. It was a little more exciting than normal, but ended up all right. Brittney was able to accompany me, so that was great. I had to arrive for the scan fasting, and so hadn't eaten anything for breakfast. Then they make you drink two huge glasses of water, and by the end of those I was shivering pretty bad. Then I went in for the scan itself. Everything was going fine at first, I was laying on the bed-thingy and moving in and out of the scanner. Then they said that they were injecting the contrast dye stuff into my IV. At that point the IV site starting hurting weird. I put up with it for a second or two and then looked over at my inner elbow, where the IV was. My arm had a slight bulge where the IV went in. By this time the nurses had come out to check on me. I guess my IV had come slightly out, so that when the injection happened, it went into my tissue instead of into my blood. The nurses said that not very much had gotten in though, before it got shut off. I guess they put sensor thing on your arm that detects this. So, they took out what remained of that IV and then gave me another one in the other arm. I had been trying to tough it out through the scan, but by now was shivering again. The nurses were great and wrapped me all up in warmed blankets while the second IV was started. It sadly took two tries. Finally it was in and they finished the scan. Then the IV was taken out and I left. They gave me an ice pack for the bulge in my arm and told me to massage it a bit and that it should go away. It was pretty weird, but by the end of the next day seemed pretty much back to normal. So that was exciting.

Now comes the day we have been waiting for. Tomorrow afternoon we meet with the doctor to discuss the scan results. It has been kind of odd to have this coming. The best way that I have thought of to describe it is like this: It is like being on a hike up a big mountain. You have never hiked the trail before, so you don't really know how long it will be, but it is a big mountain. The trail winds through some trees and for a while it is hard to tell how far you have come or how much further is left. At some point, several hours into the hike, you see a ridge up ahead, out in the clear. You can't see beyond this ridge, and so you have a lot of anticipation as you approach it. Is this the summit? Will you be done when you get there? Will the top of the mountain be in sight? Or will this be a false alarm, simply allowing you to see how much more of the mountain there is left to be climbed? Either way, the ridge is a major checkpoint, and getting there will answer some questions and leave affected emotions.

That is kind of how I feel. Tomorrow is a moment of truth. We get to find out something about how far we have made it and how far we have left to go. Either way, it is nice to know that I have such an amazing support group out there. We will let you all know whatever we find out tomorrow.

12.3-12.?: Slow and steady

It was nice to not have chemo last week. But, frankly, not as nice as we were thinking. I am not sure if it has been that lack of Neupogen, but I have been slower to recover, stomach-wise. For the last week or so, I will feel pretty good throughout the day, but then in the evening I start getting stomach cramps and feeling not good. So that hasn't been fun. Also, I got a cold over the weekend and stayed home from church. Kind of funny that I am able to go through church every Sunday during chemo, but then I am sick and miss it the first Sunday that I have missed chemo. This also reminded me how blessed we were to have me not be sick during the 6 months of chemo. That was a huge blessing.

The last few days have seen a slow improvement in the evening stomach situation. I am trying to be more cautious about what I eat, which is hard as good food is very attractive to me right now. Hopefully in the next few days I will be all the way back to "normal", whatever that means now.

I have been enjoying being able to go to work every day and feel more on top of things there. I also feel better and am able to play more with the kids and Brittney, which is really rewarding. All in all, I prefer not chemo to chemo, but not by as wide of a margin as I had anticipated.

12.0-12.2

Well, it is done. My twelfth chemo treatment has come and gone. It went fine at the Cancer Centre on Tuesday morning. The nurse got the IV in on the first try, which was amazing. Then I tried to pass out for the 4.5 hours of the ordeal. I was so grateful that Brittney's Mom was in town so that Brittney could be there with me. I sure loved having her there with me. Since we got home I have been taking it easy. I haven't eaten very much yet, and feel pretty weak, but tomorrow should be better in that regard. I am so excited for the break that is upon us from chemo etc. I can't wait until I am feeling well enough to really celebrate. I will let you all know when I get there.

11.1-11.13: Chemo tomorrow!

Well, it is upon us again, but thankfully we are to the last (planned) chemo treatment! This last treatment went really well. I felt like I was about 1 day ahead with my recovery, which was really nice and enabled me to still go to my group meeting at work last Thursday. I think a lot of it had to do with the way that chemo started last time. It was a bit later in the day, at 12:30, which allowed me to have a normal morning of food and work. The past few chemo times I had already started feeling gross from anticipation (or dread) of the approaching treatment. I still felt the same gross for the rest of that day, but the next day and the next got better a lot faster than normal.

Anyways, it was really nice to have my Mom here during the last treatment, and on Saturday we picked up Brittney's Mom from the airport. We have been so blessed by the willingness and ability of our Mom's and families to help us out. We really appreciate all the help, it makes a big difference.

Tomorrow morning at 9:15 am we go in for our last treatment! We got the CT-scan scheduled for March 27, which means that I will have around 5 weeks of no doctor, no chemo, no Neupogen. Just living. Looking forward to it.

10.7-11.0: Chemo today

Well, I am off to chemo in about 15 minutes. It got scheduled today for 12:30, which meant I was able to come into work this morning and get a few things done before I am out of commission for a few days, so that was nice.

My mom flew in last night and it is great to have her here. I love how excited the kids are to have her here. They talked her ear off (most of them at the same time) all the way home from the airport. She brought many toys and treats from our Betteridge family in Utah, as well as some Legos-cars for the boys that they put together first thing this morning.

The past week has been fine. Brittney says that my appetite is still diminished and I think she is probably right. I feel like the level that I return to after each treatment is a little bit lower each time. The nurse yesterday commented that I seemed to beam each time mention was made of the next time being the last (scheduled) chemo treatment. It is nice to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but I still have to go through two more yucky weeks in the meantime. I am glad to get going on it though, it just means it will be behind us that much sooner.

10.1-10.6

This week has felt rougher than in the past, to be quite honest. Brittney posted recently a bit on this treatment from her perspective here, and I think she describes it well. I can't quite describe what it feels like to know that another round of chemo is coming the next day. It is starting to make me feel sick just thinking about it, even before any real physical effects set in. My strategy lately has been to stay up as late as I can the night before, and then try to act passed out/sleep through as much of the treatment as possible. It is crazy to just lie there and feel myself getting physically sick over the course of a few hours.

One hard thing as the treatments pile up is that I am sort of running out of things to eat, or rather things that sound good at all when I don't feel well. For the first two days after treatment nothing at all sounds good, and I am lucky to get down a piece of toast or something. In the few days after that, I can start eating, but I am very influenced by how good (or yucky) things sound. Any foods associated in my mind with the sick feelings of chemo are a no go. Then, whatever I manage to eat during these few days ends up not being appetizing the next time around. The biggest casualty so far is water. The thought of drinking water just disgusts me. I can still manage a bit if it is ice-cold and not in a cup, like from the faucet when brushing my teeth or at the drinking fountain at work. Up till now I have relied heavily on Tang to flavor water and help me drink liquids, but this time around Tang sounds disgusting too. I have tried some different juice-like drinks, but they have similarly fallen by the wayside. My big liquid staple the last few days has been some chocolate milk that Brittney's Mom stocked us up with when she was here.

Food-wise, the thing that has survived the longest is honey-roasted peanuts. Other than that, most everything has a fragile support in my psyche. All in all, yesterday and today I have been able to eat a bit more normally, but my stomach still feels off. I sure hope there are still foods that sound good to eat once this is over, and that eventually the ill effects of my mind wear off. I am not sure I could live without chocolate milk.

In other news, Brittney's Mom was here for almost a week, and it was wonderful. It gives me so much comfort to have someone here helping take care of the kids and ease Brittney's burden when I am unable to. In many ways I feel that the chemo treatment's are hardest on her. I am tired and feel sick and try and sleep a lot, while she gets to take care of the kids, worry about and care for me, and try to handle any household duties that need taking care of during my off days. She does marvelously at these jobs, but I inevitably worry about the burden they impose. So, when there is someone here to share her burden, help out with the laundry and the kids and the dinners, it is so nice, for everyone. We are so blessed that we have had people who have been able to come out and help so much. My Mom is scheduled to come help during the next treatment, and Brittney's Mom for the last treatment. We are so blessed.

9.1-10.0 Chemo this morning!

Yesterday I had my doctor's appointment. My blood work looked fine and we will leave for the cancer center in about 20 minutes. Chemo number 10. The ninth treatment went pretty well over all. I feel like I was hit harder by it for the 4 or 5 days after, but was still able to have a pretty normal week last week. The best part is that Brittney's mom was able to come out last Friday, and she gets to stay until this Thursday. It has been really great having her here. On Saturday Brittney and I made it to the temple in the morning, and then went out to dinner in the evening. The kids seem to be really enjoying the chance to spend time with Grandma, and I think Brittney is really enjoying it as well.

I can't say that I am excited about the chemo itself, but I am excited with each step that we take, getting closer to the end. The last few treatments I have started feeling a sense of foreboding as the next chemo round approaches. But, we have to go through with it. Luckily, Brittney will be able to be at the treatment with me today, and each of our moms have plans to come out once more, so that we have help for the last two treatments as well. We are so blessed.

9.0: Back to the yuck

Today was chemo at 8:45 am. I was on my own this time, and things went ok compared to previous times. I start feeling sick as soon as I enter the building, and I have a hard time getting out of bed on chemo days. They got the IV started after only two tries this time (yay!) and I slept as much as I could. I was surprised to toward the end by my Brittney and the kids, who came to visit. They had some pictures they had drawn for me, and Gwen just kept repeating "Hi, Daddy!" over and over and burying her head in my face. It was cute. They had to wait a little bit long for me to get done, but they behaved very well.

I was a little unsure as to whether I wanted them to see me like that, but I tried to truthfully answer all their questions about the tubes and machines and other things. I am amazed by how they can handle everything in stride (or seem to, I am sure they can sense the stress of the situation at some level). They know that I am sick and that I am getting better. And I try to make sure that they also know how much I love them and how much they mean to me.

Since then I have been lying in bed. My stomach feels quite upset and delicate, like anything could push me over the edge to throw up. So far that hasn't happened yet though. Now for some sleep.

8.11-8.12: Chemo Tomorrow!

Tomorrow is already the next treatment, the time has passed more quickly this time, what with the CT scan during this last week. We had a really good Saturday and nice Sunday, and I guess we are as ready as we can be for tomorrow. Hopefully everything will go smoothly. I hope to return to more frequent posting, now that the holidays are officially far behind us. As always, thanks for your support and love, it makes all the difference in the world.

8.5-8.10 : Good News!

Yesterday I had a CT scan done at the Cancer Centre. This is apparently what is done at this point in the treatment (4 months in!) to see how the cancer is responding to the treatment and if anything needs to be changed going forward. The scan was fairly uneventful, quicker than I thought, and not too bad. The nurse said that it usually takes around 10 days to get the scan results back, so I wasn't planning on finding out the results quite yet, but today Brittney found a babysitter for the kids so that she could come with me to my appointment.

There had been a scheduling mixup, but they squeezed us in and we were able to see the doctor. I was happy to hear that he had the results of the scan already, and even happier/elated/relieved/grateful beyond description to hear him say that the results were good! It looks like all of the different enlarged nodes have shrunk in side, most to around 1/3 of their original size. One measurement of the biggest one showed a decrease from 3.5 cm to 1.2 cm. Some of the smaller nodes have disappeared altogether. The doctor seemed pleased with these results, and since he was we also were.

The plan from here on out is two more months of chemo, at which point there will be another scan, and then if everything is gone we will move to a checkup every 3 months for 2 years, and then every 6 months for 3 more years. So, still a long road, but two more months of chemo is all, as far as we know now.

We also found out that things are good to go for chemo on monday, so now we are ready to enjoy the happy news for 3 more days until the reality of chemo sets back in. But I think it will be easier to endure this time around, with the knowledge that it is working, and with some light at the end of our tunnel.

Thanks to everyone for your prayers and love. We have been so blessed in so many ways, and I get overwhelmed thinking about all of the wonderful people who love us and support us so much. We love you all!

Christmas Hiatus: 7.2 - 8.4

Welcome back! Sorry it has been a little while. We were so very blessed to have my parents and my brother Thom, his wife Brittany and their two kids Jackson and Graham in town for Christmas. My seventh treatment went fairly smoothly, and the best part was how it aligned with the holiday. My eighth treatment was two days after Christmas, which meant that I was feeling good for the Christmas celebrations, and most importantly, food! Having my family in town really helped us to forget about cancer for a while and just enjoy some time together for a normal Christmas. We had so much fun and ate so much good food (see our family blog for details on Christmas and Alec's birthday!)

Sadly, we had to come back to reality eventually, which meant for us that my parents had to return home, and I had to have chemo treatment number 8. Thom and Brittany were kind enough to watch our kids so that Brittney could accompany me to the treatment. My strategy of late has been to sleep/pretend to sleep for as much of the treatment as possible. This time was no different. It took the nurses 3 tries to get the IV in again, not sure why my veins are so troubling, but it is a bit annoying.

Upon returning home I spent most of the next few days in bed, sleeping a ton. The main effects that chemo seems to have on my is that it makes me feel gross and not want to eat, and it also makes me very tired. In the three or four days after treatment I am able to sleep pretty easily for 12 hours a day. I was able to enjoy some fun evening time with our guests, and even was able to eat some yummy Indian food that we made for our pre-New Years festivities.

Today is more of the same. Feeling not terrible, but food isn't looking the most appetizing yet. I already have my burger place lined up for next week when I feel good. Next up cancer-wise is the CT-scan on the 5th to see how things are progressing. Also, my treatments will be moving to Mondays now, due to scheduling needs.

Happy New Year's!

7.1

Today has been ok. I didn't throw up this time around (yet, knock on wood!) and so far have been resting a lot today. Just feeling pretty gross. Brittney and the kids have made me some signs for each of my treatments, and it keeps me company. I was able to eat a little something for lunch and dinner, but I am taking it pretty easy on that front. So far so good, I guess.

Chemo today: 7.0

Today I had my seventh chemo treatment. It seemed to go pretty well. My nurse was aware of the troubles with my iv in the past and was careful and got it right the first time smooth as a whistle. So here goes the next round .

Yesterday at my drs appt I learned that they have scheduled a CT scan for me for Jan 5 2012. At that point we will be able to see how the treatment is working and solidify the plan for the remaining treatments . Should be exciting.

6.0 - 6.10

Sorry about the belated update. I have been put in charge of creating a slideshow for our ward Christmas party tomorrow, and that has been taking up my evening computer time this week. I know, I know, my top priority should be adding people from the growing list of applicants to the Hall of Baldness, and I am sorry, that is true. I will try to get a number of people added in the next few days, so keep your eyes peeled.

This treatment was really a tale of two weeks. The chemo treatment went ok. I had the same nurse again, and again she had to call another nurse over after two tries to get my IV in. that was annoying, but the rest went ok. The best part was that Brittney was able to be there with me, since Tiffany was in town.

For the rest of last week, I felt like I was hit harder by the chemo than before. I threw up Tuesday evening for the first time, and just felt pretty yucky the rest of the week. But this week has been a different story. Usually going back to work on Monday I still don't feel on top of things, but this week I actually felt fine, about how I usually do on Wednesday or Thursday of my good week. And I have continued to feel good the rest of this week. The crazy thing is that we did my first Neupogen injection this morning and this means that the next treatment is around the corner. How time flies. The good part is that I am pretty quick to forget. This goes both ways, as when I feel yucky I feel like I will never feel good again, and I can't remember what it feels like to feel like eating food. But, after only a day or two of feeling back to normal I have forgotten about the yuckiness and am ready for life. Just sometimes I have ridiculous cravings for meat. But I have always enjoyed a good burger or steak, so maybe that isn't too new.

Assuming that the treatments go as planned, this marks the halfway point. Six treatments down, six to go. Hopefully they continue to go smoothly. I feel so blessed by all the support that we have received. I know that most of my blessings are not due to me, but to the many wonderful people out there who pray for me and my family. Thanks for your prayers and love, they truly make all the difference.

5.8-5.13: Chemo Tomorrow

Life has been pretty good since the last time I posted. I felt fairly normal all last week, until Saturday. Saturday and Sunday I had a bout of diarrhea and that wasn't much fun. I am feeling much better today. My doctor's appointment was fairly normal, and my counts are up and ready for chemo tomorrow. So here we go for chemo treatment number 6.

Brittney's sister Tiffany arrived on Friday and is going to be here until this Friday. It is super-fun having her here. They got their hair cut on Saturday (but they will have to wait their turn to make it into the Hall of Baldness) and have lots of fun things planned for this week.

Yesterday I got to watch a bit of the Grey Cup, which is the championship game for the Canadian Football League. My cousin Ben was on the winning team, and was named the player of the game by CBC Sports' Carlan Gay [story here]. I am so happy for him and his team, the BC Lions.

We got our Christmas tree tonight and it looks pretty good. I am sure there will be some pictures in the next few days on our family blog, so keep your eyes peeled. Christmas time is almost here, and we are getting pretty excited around here.

5.3-5.7

I have been doing pretty well lately. We had our first cold spell here in Edmonton. Over the weekend it got down below -20 C (which is like -4 F). Pretty darn cold. Today it was a positively nice +5 C. Crazy how warm 0 C can feel to a person.

I have been eating pretty normally since the weekend and going into work normally the past 2 days. Trying to enjoy this good week while it lasts. Looking forward to Thanksgiving.

5.1 & 5.2

Today and yesterday have been ok. Yesterday I felt as good as I have on the day after treatment, and I even ate decently. Today though, I haven't been feeling quite as good. Nothing terrible, just yucky. We have been blessed to have food delivered from members of the ward yesterday and today, and someone let the boys play at their house during Gwen's nap to give Brittney a bit of a break. It has been snowing all day and the boys seem to love it.